The present moment

This year for lent I vowed to grow  closer to God through prayer, meditation and not creating more conflict with anyone for 40 days meaning not reacting to any “trigger”so to speak.  As if this was not enough of a challenge I added no facebook and no coffee.  The first week of no coffee was great I switched to chai tea and found my body really feeling better.  Week number 2 the flu hit my kids I cheated a little figured the ole higher power would let me slide.  Then we had a family emergency I lost some of my willpower.  Then vacation. Lost more.  What I realized through this process is although I may not have kept my no coffee for 40 days goal. It made me aware of when and what I put in my body and more importantly….Why?  I love coffee, I have no other vices or habits (at least none that are unhealthy or would land in me in trouble) so I let go.  Then I switched my brain to everytime I reached to text someone back I prayed.  Sometimes we have a quick smart response to something that could have just been a yes or a no.  Sometimes we make things more complicated.  So I prayed before I spoke on the phone, before I reacted to a relative or friend without thinking does this need anymore or can I just leave it alone?  What did I learn?  I am more peaceful speaking my truth directly and calmly.  Even if people do not receive what I say the way I think they will.  That is none of my business.

I also learned I do need coffee but don’t need sugary creamer everytime.  I need to be aware of the extra desserts and how my body reacts to them afterall I can still get hooked on anything I can have too much of.  Lent was beautiful it was truly a reflective, spiritual time.  My soul searching has gotten rather large.  I have many interests and my heart is screaming for many new directions but I am not sure which to follow so I follow the one I hear loudest God who says garden, do yoga, meditate and help someone and you’ll get your answer.