It’s ok to fall apart

For most of my life I thought I had to be strong.  Hold feelings in.  Don’t let them see you sweat.  Act as if even when inside you were feeling less than ok.  Over the years I have learned as the layers are removed more beauty comes when we show people our vulnerability.  Human beings have this innate ability to connect with other humans and share life’s ups and downs.  We need a super network.  We need a tribe.  We need people to show up for us and our kids.  We need to share the beautiful moments as well as the flu’s, deaths, job losses, pet illnesses, or just crappy days with others.  That’s what helps us know we are not alone.

This week I came down with a tickle in my throat I thought oh no this can’t be I had bronchitis 2 weeks ago.  Well it rapidly turned into walking pneumonia.  2 days and about 5 million cough attacks later and there is the part of me that thinks “Why is so and so never sick.”  Who cares they have different stressors and different DNA and you know what with sickness brings change.  So as I am googling a very good probiotic.  A friend texts to check on me and another sends a pic because I couldn’t  make the awards show although in my crazy brain I was thinking maybe I should go.  The kids will survive if I am not there.  What about all the parents who have no choice and cannot make any awards it helps the kids realize we are afterall humans, and self-care comes first.  Especially if you are coughing up a lung!

So let the tears flow when you feel lonely.  Call a friend and tell them you aren’t quite yourself.  Ask for help.  Or just curl up and watch your favorite mini-series.  This is something I rarely do but sickness allows me this ability to slow down and remember its ok to just lay around in your pj’s!

 

25 Comments

  1. aw I hope you feel better soon. My emotions were up and down this whole week too… it’s so easy to forget that not everything is going to okay all the time and that’s okay too. Hope you have a great weekend! rest well x

  2. This is such a lovely post. It took some time for me to accept the fact that it’s okay not to be okay, and it’s alright to ask for some help from a friend. Thanks for sharing this!

  3. Thank you for your beautiful message of how important it is to be vulnerable. You are an extraordinary writer and your words are inspirational

  4. I think it’s ok to be real with the kids too. I don’t tiptoe much (on some things lately though, I have been, like school shootings…how do you NOT bring that up, but how do you?!?). Just a thought… on something I’m having a hard time being real with the kids about right now.

    • Thank you for sharing so openly. I shelter my kids as they are young as much as I can but then they need to know the real world can be scarey so they are prepared. I pray and hope that one day good may come to our youth and this crazy world. Please come back to my blog and thank you for visiting. Feel free to share it with others.

      Becky
      http://www.soberfemale.com

  5. I completely agree. it is okay to not always be on top of your game and not always feel good. You’re a human after all and sometimes, you need to not be strong so that you can be again

  6. It took me many years to learn that sometimes you need a good cry or a good scream. People need a release to let it out and fall apart in order to get past the stress and pain.

  7. What a timely article. I am one of those peeps who always believes that I need to be strong. Thank you for posting this. Maybe I will have a good cry.

  8. This!!! I need to follow your advice! I’m always going it alone, so seemingly strong. Seemingly being the word! Lol! I’m a mess half the time. I don’t struggle w any addiction, but do struggle with depression and anxiety often. I love all your posts! Amazing for you to do this for people ?

    • Hi I am recently struggling more with the chemical imbalance in my brain as well. Exercise helps a ton and yoga. I am a member at NSB athletic Id love to meet up for a class or a walk. Thank you for your support. Love,
      Becky

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